WINGS NATION MONDAY MAILBAG: Attack of the Clones

The Red Wings are a quarter of the way through their season, so we decided to open up the mailbag again. All of today’s questions are via Instagram.

The goal horn at LCA is actually a recording of the goal horn from the Joe. It’s been the source of a lot of drama among Wings fans this season, who apparently really, really hate it. For me, it’s just a goal horn. I’m really not too fussed about the sound that plays when the team scores or wins a game. Fret not, though, as apparently they are working on getting a real one installed. This video, posted a couple of days ago, shows somebody pushing the goal horn at LCA. Doesn’t really explain anything, it’s just a cool demonstration of how it works.

I’m assuming you mean the Detroit Red Wings alumni association game schedule? If so, the schedule as already been released. You can find it here.

First of all, I don’t think that the Red Wings are over-reaching by that much. There were some very vocal opinions in the offseason that said the team would be fighting for last place, but I think most reasonable people saw that the Wings were an average team who would more than likely land just outside of a playoff spot. If you go look at the standings right now, that’s exactly where they are.

But I did my due diligence and had a look at the numbers. At 5v5, the Wings are currently shooting at 7.79% (league average = 7.98%) and have a 93.12% save percentage (league average = 92.09%). They’re expected goals for (xGF) is at 36.5, while their actual goals for is at 37. They’re expected goals against (xGA) is at 39.12, while their actual goals against is at 35. So, they’re not far off from where the numbers are saying they should be. They are experiencing some above average goaltending from Jimmy Howard and that’s what’s keeping them afloat in the standings.

Basically, what this heat map shows us is that Jimmy Howard is saving more goals than expected. The team is heavily relying on him to win games. If Howard gets hurt or starts to recede and Mrazek can’t meet that elite level of play, it likely means sliding down the standings.

So to answer your question: the Red Wings success can only last as long as Jimmy Howard can keep up his elite play.

Franzen is locked up for two more seasons after this one, but there’s really not much to worry about there. By placing Franzen on the Long Term Injured Reserve every year, they can stop his $3.95-million salary from hitting the cap once the season is underway.

Theoretically, the technology required to clone an organism already exists. In fact, in 1997, scientists announced the first successfully cloned mammal: a sheep named Dolly. Here is the process for Reproductive Cloning, per knowgenetics.org:

So, in theory, we’d just need to take a cell from each of Datsyuk, Fedorov, and Bure, place them into an egg to create an embryo, then find a surrogate to carry the embryo and give birth. Though the theoretic science exists, the greater issues would come from the sociological aspects of cloning. How much of the original players’ talent came from their environment? Would these clones even like hockey? What if they preferred playing defense?

Even if they were perfect clones, we’d have to wait 17-18 years form the time of their birth until their minds and bodies were ready to play professional hockey. With that kind of timeline, we are better off diving into a rebuild where this team could be turned around in 3-5 years.

We’d also need to find a surrogate mother. Any takers?